just rambling....on&on&on

we always want what we can't have, and have what we don't want.
we always wish for things, but never dream big enough.
we could have all the things we could ever think up, if we really tried.
but the problem is that we just don't have big enough goals or dreams.
i thought they'd go away, if I willed it to happen......
or that I'd be able to atleast maintain and control them
but what i found just taunts me - i can't escape feeling
you can't tell your heart what it wants, it's already decided
if you're not supposed to want it, you usually want it more.
if you look for flaws, you will find them
but if you accept that no one is flawless, then you'll accept the minor details.
I CAN'T LET GO!
I can move on. I can find distractions. I can look, search, long for.
There's always something bigger, something better.
there's always room to expand those desires.
you don't need.
you just want.
wanting gets you no where.
Often, no where is an easier place to be, than somewhere great.
less risk, less chances, less change.
less faith.
renew the lost hope. yearn for something greater.
Give it all away.
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today i had chinese food and i got my fortune and it said something really amazingly true about me.
something about being good at forming relationships with people but not letting them in.
its worded cool, i'll copy it sometime.. but its downstairs and im too lazy.
then.... for fun, i read my myspace horoscope.
i hate horoscopes.. but i think they are funny usually.
this one, unfortunately, was dead serious. not funny at all.
unfair that i could get advice from something so trivial, and so unreal...and something i dont actually believe in.
yet sometimes things i do believe in, let me down. (never God though)
but here it is anyway:

Everything comes back to what you believe about yourself. Sure, you Aquarians realize that you're different from others. You may not want to fit into the expected norms of society, yet you do want to feel like you belong to something greater than your isolated self. Reestablish your values, based on what you need, by including those around you in your vision.