I think it's amazing that when you hand something over to God, He actually takes care of it all. For so long I'd try to deal with my own burdens, or I thought I was giving them to God through prayer, but I was still subconsciously holding on to them. Just recently I've experienced what it feels like to have complete abandon, to give it over 100% to God. It's such a relief.
There are times when I don't think I can make it, and He comes through to build me a bridge over my troubles.
We had another Hot Spot worship session at Redeemer on Thursday, and while nothing could ever beat the last one we had, this one was still amazing. I don't think I've ever felt such a strong desire and need to pray before.
And so often I think that we as Christians like to avoid thinking about spiritual warfare because it's a scary topic, and things are much safer if we plead ignorance to such a subject. But really, I know that the more I worship my God, the more it angers Satan. He will attack on all angles just to try and knock down my spirit. (See Job if you don't believe me) But I think we need to recognize the war that is being fought for our souls right now. Sometimes everything seems wrong, and this world is a messed up place, but for the life of me I can't blame it on God. I get so angry and frustrated with Him for allowing us to have our free will that causes us to sin, but I can't blame Him for all the evil in this world. If God is all good, then He can't be evil. He can't cause evil things to happen because then He would not be all good, and all perfect, which He is.
I know that the bad things come from our imperfectness, from our sin, from our inability to seek God's voice, from Satan- the ultimate evil. Somewhere amidst it all I know I'll find His grace.
But then again... some might say I have it easy. I haven't had many bad things happen to me directly. At least nothing like death, abuse, assault, rape, etc. But I have had my battles. Insecurities, no self esteem, low confidence, fear of failure, fear of rejection, betrayal. No father. Still.... Christ is my only redeeming grace and He took my punishment for sin... if that's not enough to prove His love, than nothing ever could.